NYWC - Reflections on day 2

I woke up at 5:00 this morning and I was wide awake. I didn't want to get up and it kinda felt like one of those moments where you wake up and God is sitting on the edge of your bed. I was reluctant to get up and kept telling myself that it was probably just my random thoughts racing in my head. I didn't bother to write anything down. It was too dark, and I wanted more sleep since we’ve been pulling some late nights here.

Later in the day I grabbed some scrap paper and a pen and jotted down some thoughts I remembered. It didn't really make a whole lot of sense. “I want to help people see God. I want to see God. I want to be authentic and I want my authentic self to be a deep lover of God and others. I want to learn how to look at people and really see them. I want to listen and really hear. And I want to help others see and hear themselves and God.”

I wasn’t sure what all that was about. I just woke up thinking it. Its pretty easy to forget to do that stuff. Earlier today I was again flipping through those 3x5 cards my students gave me. They are incredible people. One of them wrote this, "God doesn't need us to accomplish His will, but He offers us the chance to be a part of what He is doing." I've gone back and read that about three times today. Pretty good advice from a high school student.

Later on Mike Pilavachi was speaking in a general session and he said, “We can get involved in God’s ministry or we can work really hard trying to develop our own.” When you say it like that it sounds really dumb to try to develop our own. I wonder why I feel like I need to. I think that’s what God meant last year when I heard him say, “Stop trying to change the world… that’s My job.”

Then what’s left to do then for all of us who have handed our lives over to God in response to this calling we have for ministry? Love people deeply. See them. Hear them. Embrace them with the arms of Jesus. I’m losing track of whether that’s my answer or if it’s Gods. I think that’s a good thing.

Pilavachi said, “Jesus calls us to love the world one human being at a time.” I want to slow down and actually see people. I’m in the bad habit of not doing that so well. I think I’ve let my focus shift to the crowds. I get pretty excited when I think about the students I get to teach. These little cards are reminding me of how awesome they are.

I think I’ve answered my question for today. The question I came here with. “What is it that God is saying to you right now?” I was reminded tonight about what I believe God has been saying for several years. In fact, I feel like my whole life is building up in this direction of learning how to really love people. I have a long way to go, but at least I feel like I am aiming in the right direction.

I wonder what tomorrow will be like…